What Size is a 375ml?

This conversation really happened.  Just this past Friday I had this phone call.

Ring

Me: "Can I help you?"

No answer.  I hang up.

Ring - same guy.  We have caller ID.

Me: "Can I help you?"

Customer: "I'm looking to buy 100 bottles for favors.  I want the smaller sizes, but not the really small ones."

Me: "We have a few splits.  Do you know which wine you'd like?"

Customer:  "What's a split?"

Me: "375ml."

Customer: "How much wine is that?"

Me: "A half bottle"

Customer: "Where would that be on the label?"

Me: "Depending on the bottle, possibly the front."

Customer: "I have a bottle in front of me.  It says 750ml."

Me: "And?"

Customer: "How much wine is that other bottle mentioned?"

Me: "Half of the bottle in front of you."

Customer: "How many ml's is that?"

Me: "375ml!"

Customer: "What price do they start at?"

Me: "Splits start at $8.79 and up."

Customer: "What's a split?"

Me: " A HALF BOTTLE IS COMMONLY REFERRED TO AS A SPLIT BECAUSE IT'S LIKE SPLITTING A REGULAR BOTTLE IN HALF!"

Customer: $8.79 for a small bottle?  I need 100!"

Me: "I can order you anything you want."

Customer: "Thanks.  Good-bye."

My colleague is looking at me and laughing.  I explain this whole conversation to him and then...

Ring

Me: "Same guy.  I'm not answering."

Colleague: "Can I help you?"

Customer's Wife: "My husband is an idiot.  He doesn't know what he's doing.  Do you have Crane Lake?"

Colleague: "Yes.  $3.99/btl"

Customer's Wife: $3.99?  Why did someone quote him that you only have bottles $8.79 and up?"

Colleague:  "I don't know."

Customer's Wife: "We'll be in tomorrow to get 100 bottles."

My colleague told me what she said and I went off the handle.  He asked me for half bottles!!  Glad I won't be in when they come in to get these.

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