The Braggart

He's not the Ladies Man, but he is the Braggart.  He's the guy that demands your undivided attention while he shops, asks you lots of questions, tells you about all the expensive wines he has in his cellar, what expensive wine he drank last night, and then doesn't buy anything remotely expensive because he has too much of that already.  Of course, my eyes are usually rolling around in my head while he talks, but I'm hopeful to make a big sale until he crushes me.

Braggart: "Do you have Opus One?"

Me: " No sorry.  You have to be on my private list for that.  I've sold my allocation this year."

Braggart:  "Well, I have Opus in every vintage going back 10 years, some Opus magnums, and last night.. oh hey Jimmy, what did mom say I should have opened last night?"

Jimmy: "The magnum of Opus."

Braggart: "Right.  Mom said that.  She doesn't know ho much that costs!"

And then this goes on and on and on and on until I want to smash my head in with a hammer while he tells me about all the 1st growth Bordeaux's he has, magnums of this and that, and he's chasing me around the store while I always look unimpressed and disinterested about his extensive collection.

When he leaves the store, he spends about $200 on 12 bottles.  Please don't come back.

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