Talk to My Ass

This customer weirds me out and it happens more than you think.  It never fails that when I bend down to pick up a bottle, a box, garbage or whatever, someone, behind me, will talk to my ass.  I am literally bent over.  There is never an "excuse me", a throat clearing or any indication that someone is behind me.  The person just asks a question...to my ass.

I bend down and I hear, "where is the beer?"  I stand up and turn around.  What?  Are you talking to me?  I wonder if they think that my ass will actually talk back.  Maybe I should pull an Ace Venura.  I've thought about looking between my legs and talking back to them.  Maybe I could start a whole new thing.  Like planking in different public places.  I could bend over and look between my legs and talk to them in different aisles in the store.  I could even walk that way to make it easier on the customer.  That would probably get me written up, which will bring me to tomorrow's blog.

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