We Get All Types

A customer walked in and said he wanted to return some wine.  I asked him to step over to the counter to take a look at what he had.  He had one unopened magnum of Woodbridge Cabernet/Merlot and one opened bottle of the same with about 2 inches of wine in it.

Customer: "I'd like to return this.  It has sediment in it."

Me: "And?"

I thought there would be more to the story.  I thought wrong.

Customer: "It turned my tongue purple."

Customer sticks tongue out and points to said tongue.

Now, I'm thinking...gross.  You drank this last night and still didn't brush your teeth yet?  

Me: "And?"

Customer: "It has sediment in it.  I brought the bottle to show you the sediment."

Me: "Thank you.  I know what sediment looks like.  You should see the sediment in the 05 Rioja we just decanted.  Looked like a pile of sand."

I then proceed to tell him how natural sediment is and it won't harm him if he consumes it and to get himself a good strainer.  He is clearly not hearing me.

Customer: "It turned my tongue purple.  I brought the sediment to show you."

He is clearly out of his mind.  I told him that since he drank 90% of the opened bottle I could not refund that, but I would refund the unopened bottle.  He was amazed and shocked even that I would question the fact that this wine would have sediment.  

He told me that the wine had no clarity.  Yup, red wine has no clarity, sir.  That's why it's red.

Here is your money.  Have a nice day.  And, thanks for leaving me an opened bottle of wine that I now have to dump out and recycle.

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